[bigletter]Though I recently wrote about the opportunities that come with a global pandemic, I also want to stress that right now is not the time to be hard on yourself for all the things you can not do, or all the things you have not done. It’s time for you to cherish the moment and nothing further. I know what it’s like, though. I have days where I’m so productive, and I seize the day head-on getting massive amounts of work done. Those days I feel so good about myself and the future seems bright. I’m grateful. I’m excited, and I notice the blessings in the midst of this chaos. Then there are days when I don’t want to get out of bed and I do barely that. I shower, order take-out and just watch tv, write or read. And on those days when I don’t have an ounce of energy in my body, I am particularly mean to myself.[/bigletter]
The not so gentle giant of anxiety creeps up on me and starts blaming me for days like that. I begin to think that if I didn’t have slow days and if I wasn’t so lazy and complacent, I would be way ahead in life and I would have accomplished so much more. I am very hard on myself and because of that, I expect my performance to be at peak at all times, and it shouldn’t be that way. But it is.
For days like those, when things seem blurry and nights get long, (because sleep isn’t my best friend right now) I have a few things that keep me grounded, and though I’m mostly in bed and resting, I feel safe, calm and at a place where my anxiety and self doubt doesn’t get the best of me.
Integrating flowers into my room
Recently a random person in a coffee shop gave me flowers. It was the sweetest encounter ever, and I took it as a message from the universe that everything was going to be ok, after a really difficult week I had experienced. My energy was low, and I was sad from a really unfortunate situation I had with a friend. I put them in my room and they completely changed the mood. The smell, the vibe and the look and feel of the space changed. My mood was very upbeat as well. From then on, I have understood the value of some flowers in one’s room, and I will never again take that for granted.
Using essential oils, especially lavender
Lavender is my favorite scent, so I have a few mini bottles of essential oils. I always travel with one. I keep one on my desk and one near my diffuser. Most of the time while I’m cleaning or when I’m just in a calm mood in my room, I turn it on and use my oil to make the room smell good. The fragrance from the oils of the lavender plant is believed to help promote calmness and wellness as well as reduce stress and anxiety. For me, the smell alone is enough to make me feel so cozy and at peace.
Lathering my body with oils
I don’t use many lotions, except the Vaseline brand one, which I use for my legs when they get ashy. Other than that, I prefer oils. Almond oil, lavender oil, coconut oil and Bio Oil are some of my go-to’s. To remove my makeup I have coconut oil, but for my upper body I’m obsessed with Bio Oil or almond. Though I’m staying in bed all day, I do take a morning shower, then lather in oils and wait 15 minutes before putting my pajama back on.
Writing in my gratitude journal
To avoid extreme anxiety, I write in my gratitude journal every morning. I put the date at the top, then the words, “I am grateful for,” followed by three things I feel most grateful for – usually the first three things that pop into my head. Sometimes I’m repetitive with things such as my health, having food on the table, and a bed to sleep in. Other times I’m more grateful for a certain career opportunity that has happened, or a big life event that makes me feel happy and full. This mindfulness practice gives me perspective and reminds me that all is well after all.
Taking morning vitamins
This has been a game changer. I began doing it religiously a few weeks ago, and I’m so grateful I did. I take vitamin E, C, Biotin, Collagen powder with my coffee or tea, and I have integrated Perfectil (hair vitamins) into the routine as well. I take about 9 pills in the morning, so naturally it takes me 15 minutes to down them, since some are massive and I can’t do it all at once. But that’s ok…it’s 15 minutes of time for me and my body.
Applying my skincare routine
My good skin has been my pride and joy this past year. My skincare journey has been a long one, but one that I’ve learned so much throughout – including how our emotions affect our complexions, our spots and acne, or in my case our rashes and hives. Now, I have no breakouts at the moment, but to me it’s really important to keep my skin nourished whether I’m being productive throughout the day or not. Soft, healthy, hydrated skin makes me happy, so my routine is important to me even if I don’t do anything. I use the Patchology face masks and keep them on for 30 minutes just soaking in, and by doing by routine morning and night, I feel like I’ve accomplished something meaningful to me that day.
Drinking chai tea and decaf
I’ve always been such a big coffee gal. I always will be. I usually have a morning coffee and an afternoon one, but I’ve had to switch to decaf, because my anxiety and sleeplessness won’t allow for me to drink regular coffee at 3 pm. So in the mornings I have a homemade chai tea latte with coconut milk (and a spoonful of powdered collagen), and in the evening if I want a little pick-me-up so I don’t fall asleep and risk not being able to do so in the evenings, I drink a decaf latte and trick my body into thinking I’m having the regular afternoon coffee without the caffeine. These little details do make a difference in how our bodies react to the current times. If caffeine gives you insomnia…get rid of it, or of a fragment of it.
Doing daily affirmations
Affirmations remind me that I am powerful and that I have the capacity to transform my life and do anything I want with it (see, that’s an affirmation in itself!), and that is why I do them religiously. They make me feel like I am concentrated on exactly what it is that I want, while projecting it to the universe through thoughts and words. They remind me of my goals and that I am working towards achieving them even if the present day means I NEED TO REST and only rest.
Practicing meditation
Putting my mind at a pause for 10-15 minutes every day is an amazing alleviator. There is no right or wrong way of meditating, so don’t feel bad if you think you’re doing it wrong. Just close your eyes and let your thoughts float by without grasping onto ant of them. Dismiss them. Allowing my thoughts to get away as they float by like clouds in my head, helps me soothe my monkey brain and chill the fuck out for a few minutes.
Keeping an agenda
Though I have off days, I still like to keep track of what is going on in my work life, and for that I have my agenda. Writing everything down is another form of therapy for me. It’s taking a thought and putting it on a piece of paper so I can rest from thinking about it every few minutes, and I put it down with a date and more structured call to action. My agenda is my assistant that doesn’t speak (I also have Alexa). Knowing that I have everything organized within my planner also allows for me to feel in control of my life and assignments although physically I am not in control of how low energy I am feeling.
Creating a space that allows me to raise my vibration
Having a clean and organized room, but especially an area within it that I enjoy and can feed off of energetically. That is my night stand, where I keep all my morning and evening journals, my essential books, some crystals, my every day jewelry and (in the green box) some nail polish so I can reach over and paint my nails if I feel like it, though that’s rare because I usually keep them clear. Anyway, that is the happy space in my house. I put on a face mask, turn on my diffuser, light up my salt lamp and meditate or nap or whatever I feel like doing – I try to not put pressure on myself on what I should be doing for the sake of “self care”.
On days like this, I keep reminding myself that we all have our moments and that I am only human.
This year has been complicated for all of us. It has been emotionally draining. It has been exhausting, and it is only August. We are not fully done yet. However, it is important for me to keep in mind that regardless of the year, of the pandemic and of the many things that may cause me insecurity, there will always be good days and there will always be bad days. That is why it’s important for me to find the little things that keep me grounded and nurture my soul when I’m not feeling fully at peak emotionally.
If you’re reading this as feel the same way, now you know that you are not alone. There are so many people like you and me. So go find the little things that keep you centered in gratuity, so you can rest assured that with them, you will find the peak within the pit of some of your days.
From London…
